I Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore: Coping with Anxiety

Does any of this sound familiar?

• It's 3:00am and although you’ve slept four hours, now you’re wide awake because there are hamsters rabidly racing around a wheel in your brain.

• You bite your fingernails down to the quick (and they really don’t taste that good, either).

• You overthink and overthink until you feel like you've gone full circle in your mind with no viable solution to show for it other than those horizontal wrinkles on your forehead.

• Those knots in your stomach just won't relax. 

• People - all the people!  So.  Many.  People.  Too much!

• There's no way you're going to go over the Green River Bridge even though they "fixed" it.  New bolts or not, you refuse to find out if they’ll hold.  You take the long way ‘round.

• You know which medications to take for the inevitable headache that comes on too often.

• You have your "to go" bag ready in your car because Mt. Rainier is going to blow her top any day (or so you think) and the lahars are going to travel fast!

• Life feels overwhelming and things feel out of control.

• Your shoulders touch your ears because you're just so tense.

At some point, everyone experiences anxiety.  Anxiety isn’t bad.  It’s uncomfortable but necessary.  There’s a reason we’re supposed to experience anxiety and there’s a way to partner with it.  Anxiety can be a healthy response to things that our mind feels concerned about.  It becomes clinical, however, when it interferes with daily functioning and relationships.  If this is the case for you, working with an experienced therapist can help you get it under control so you can have your life back.

Here are some quick tips and tricks that might help you as you’re waiting for your intake appointment.

1. Breathe.  When you feel your heart racing, you need to tell your mind that everything is going to be alright.  When things are alright, we feel calm.  Calm means a slower heart rate.  Slow your heart rate down. 

Diaphragmatic Breathing: Breathe in through your nose for about 4 beats, hold it for about 4 beats, then exhale fully for 4 beats.  Make sure you have good posture so you can really expand your lungs.  Lie down on your back if that helps.  Repeat this gentle breathing cycle as much as you can tolerate.  Notice how your heart rate slows down.

2. Relax your muscles.   Relaxed and stressed don’t co-occur.  Tense your muscles as tight as you can, then relax them.  Give them a good stretch, too.  Focus on several muscle groups.  You may want to use mild heat like a bath, shower or heating blanket to help your muscles warm up a bit and get a little more out of stretching.

3. Integrate self-care into your daily routine.  Is there a little something you can do nice for yourself?  Maybe it’s a cuppa warm tea that feels like a treat.  What about sitting in front of the fireplace for a while or watching a sunset over the Olympics?  Think: mini mental health break.

4. Vitamins and supplements.   Talk to your doctor about what may work for your body.  They know that some vitamins, minerals and adaptogens can really help with anxiety.

5. Competing voices.  You can’t hear the awful thoughts when you have competing conversations going on.  Make a fun playlist of songs that you enjoy so you can sing along and give yourself a brain break.  This is not a cure but helps in the moment to stop the unhelpful thoughts.

6. Exercise.  Fight or flight kicks in when our minds sense danger.  The relief felt after a get-away signals to the nervous system that something dangerous has been evaded.  By elevating your heart rate and following it up with a refractory relief replicates the sensation of evading a predator.  Your relieved mind says, “Whoo!  Dodged that!  Time to rest.”  HIT training. Wind sprints.  Something quick followed by a physical relief.

7. Sleep.  Foundational, this is super important to figure out.  Without replenishing sleep, anxiety is going to be difficult to tame.  Make this a priority.  Aim for 8 hours.

8. No caffeine, drugs, nicotine, or alcohol.  Nope.  Time to kick it.  The bottom line is that using any of these may feel good in the moment, but substances don’t cure the source of the anxiety. Over time, using substances will make things worse.  (Psst – meds don’t cure anxiety, either.  They just makes our bodies less responsive.) 

The best treatment for anxiety isn’t medication.  It’s therapy.  An experienced mental health therapist can help you.  You’ll unpack why your mind is asking you to be cautious and on edge.  You’ll also learn how to deal with it.  And you’ll feel so much better!

P.S.  The picture above of the rooster has absolutely nothing to do wtih this article, but it was just such a good photo I had to find a place for him.  I think he was a bit anxious being stalked for a photo.  There we go.  Is that a good tie in?